“You don’t look like you have cancer.”
I had an appointment with my oncologist today and her quote is the title of this blog post. It was a compliment, especially coming from my doctor who does not EVER sugar coat anything and it has been a common theme lately even among family and friends. I have heard more than once “You beat cancer” Like it has been a slam dunk and though I want to embrace the idea that my body is 100 percent healthy, I find myself correcting people regularly, which feels kind of bad. I really appreciate the fact that those who have been rooting for me think I have incredible super healing powers and don’t get me wrong, I think I have done pretty well AND I totally appreciate the support and confidence in my abilities but I need everyone to slow their roll a bit. The thing is, I believe there are power in words, especially regarding the ones that we speak ourselves and if I am constantly having to remind people that I have cancer than I start to feel like I am setting the intention that I will always have it. This is probably more of a “me” problem and the fact that I like to make sure people are correct about my health status but societally if we could just stop projecting our assumptions, however good intentioned they are on others, I believe that would be a huge relief for those who present a “normal” facade but have something that they are dealing with behind the curtains. This of course doesn’t just have to be cancer, it could literally be anything, we all have our shit and that’s good to keep in mind.
This is a message to myself as well as others, it can feel uncomfortable to know of someone’s suffering and/or disease and it’s natural to want to make it better but it’s not our job to fix things however badly we want to and we can’t edit someone else’s story in order to make ourselves feel better. I don’t mean any of this to sound harsh, seriously, they are just my thoughts and experiences. Support and community is really important especially in our world today where we are so isolated due to pandemics, political/religious beliefs and technology.
All love and support is appreciated.
Until next time ❤️