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Slowly emerging

I used to make jewelry and art pieces to sell at craft fairs quite a bit in my life before getting sick. It's been a long time and of course Covid puts a bit of a fly in the ointment for me these days but I was invited to sell my books by a local shopkeeper at her lovely wine shop and I felt like the risk was worth it. Ideally I would have set up outside in the really nice faux Italian like courtyard but Fall has decided to finally start so I made a decision to set up inside and hope for the best. It was a nice turn out but not too packed, which I am actually relieved about. I sold quite a few books and had lovely conversations...I forgot how much I liked to interact with people, an easy thing when one feels too crappy to move off of the couch.

For a long while I felt like my head was barely above water but now I am starting to feel like I am actually swimming instead of just barely treading, I am actually now starting to look for a part-time remote position which feels weird to write...3 years ago I wasn't sure I would ever be able to even think about working again...Honestly I wasn't even quite sure I would be around all that long, though I have always been willing to just see exactly how far I could get, I mean why not?

I saw my oncologist this week and I am still stable, I made a quart of blood between my last two appointments which means I am almost not anemic. I brought up the research I found about herpes curing cancer and once again she said "That is not for you." I said "One of these days I won't have cancer and you will wonder why. That's when I will tell you I went out and got herpes!" She laughed and sent me back into the infusion room to meet my clinical trial nurse...You never know, it's ultimately my job to attain my own healing. This is not to say that the treatment I have received hasn't helped but I am apart of this, I need to participate too. I am listening to a book called "The Wisdom In The Cells" about thoughts and words changing the direction and health of the cells in the body...I have been pretty good with my words and thoughts but I can do better and I am going to try, once again, why not?

I am tired but it's been a good day.

Until next time ❤️

Side note: This is Baby T, one of the furry mascots at Cellardog, he made me miss my Fiona. I love shops that have dogs, ha! If you're in Westmoreland/Sellwood check out this spot, it's really great and full of lovable creatures to go along with the wine.

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