I am so tired I can’t think of a fun title for this blog post but definitely not cancer tired, more like “Holy shit, I am so busy” tired…There’s a difference. Cancer tired is a heavy fog that makes one want to just lay down, an exhaustion that you wear like one of those weighted blankets though I imagine not comforting in the same way the blankets are. I do still have cancer, I am not in remission like that news network that covered the US National Air Guitar competition said the other night during the 11:00pm News…I wish 🙄 Though I do find that people closer to me are kind of assuming I am all better. I do feel pretty good though, I really am in a state of daily shock about just how good I feel but still, I have a ways to go. People see me doing things but they can’t peer inside of my body or presume to know the non sexy activities in my pants.
I started hyperbaric chamber therapy AND an online IT program on the same day this week, both of which are intense. I wish I could work on the course work while in the chamber but it’s just not possible, so I watch a movie and breathe in the heavy oxygen, hoping that it will illicit a positive change in my body. There is no way I could have the massage practice I had before I fell ill though, it’s a definite reality check. Yes, I am definitely better but not “I don’t have cancer anymore” better, at least not yet. My energy is longer lasting but I still have to be easy on myself. I am not being negative in saying these things, it is my reality right now, a weird purgatory of sorts, one foot in the sunshine and the other in a tar pit…I am moving forward slowly but at least it feels like I am actually moving again and for this I am grateful.
Charles made an inspirational video dedicated to some of the women air guitarists who have competed over the years at various U.S. Air Guitar competitions across the country. Along with that video is the opener to the pre show I performed with the hussies live (the live portion will be posted later.)
I need to go lay down now.
Until next time ❤️