Today was the first day I changed my ostomy bag and Klaus was not the size of a baseball, he looked his normal self, I wanted to hug my little stoma, it made me appreciate my weird little butthole. I am feeling stronger and more of who I think I am if that makes sense. I have felt weaker in the last few weeks than I ever have and though I don't like to experience that kind of helplessness it has made me accept kindnesses that I probably should have accepted a long time ago.
It is so hard to ask, let alone accept help but I did it and I left myself open to my friends and family to do the things that would help make our lives more manageable. My heart is so full it hurts.
I am not 100 percent but maybe a low 70 percent. I actually half ass cleaned our bathroom and I have been keeping up on the dishes. Often I have to lay down between tasks but the time between chores is longer. I am too chicken to walk Ruby Sue yet, she is so strong but if I keep feeling better I will be able to soon.
My friends and family have cleaned up my yard and are preparing it for a easy
maintenance sanctuary, things are finally feeling better and looking up. Wednesday I get all of the tests for the upcoming clinical trial that I am really optimistic about.
I hope things keep getting better, the bad I have just experienced is almost comically bad, cheers to life getting really good again.
Ruby Sue and I lay out in the sun today before the rain and thunder, how lucky we were.
Until next time ❤️