It’s the small things.
In the “Before Cancer Times” I would wait until the last minute on projects or required things (such as taxes) and use my adrenaline to fuel my body and brain so I could accomplish the tasks that I had before me. In the “After Cancer Times” I have learned to aim for the low hanging fruit and hope for the best, ha! If I get two things done on my imaginary list I have to consider this a win and often accomplished with at least one or two breaks. Add on an injured hip/low back situation with an intermittent low grade fever and it just slows things down even more...Frustrating.
The weekend was busy for me, I put on my virtual book launch party for “Fiona Plays With Her Beaver” on Facebook live and it turned out pretty entertaining and then the next day I did an on-air interview on the Twitch platform for US Air Guitar’s show “No Strings Attached” which is a goofy, mostly weekly show that is a mix of Wayne’s World, Hee Haw and Laugh In. It was fun but just those two things knocked me a little low, not the worst I have been but a reminder that my energy is not infinite. No regrets though, this is just the price I pay at this time, a good reminder to be kind to myself, especially when the urge is to bang my head with my hand and yell “Stupid, stupid, stupid...” Cancer is a good time to break these kind of self loathing habits, what is cancer anyway but a sort of auto-immune disease? Your own cells mutating and having an extensive fraternity party where nobody is getting their deposit back, an indication that we need to give ourselves some love and understanding as goopy as that sounds.
I have recently discovered TikTok, I Can get lost for quite awhile scrolling through the 59 second videos, one such video I saw today spoke about a doctor who has discovered a laser cancer treatment that cured cancer in mice within 15 days of one session. This doctor who happens to be black as well as female (doubly cool), aims to make this treatment affordable and accessible to the masses (once she gets through the human trial phase). The intention is to keep it out of the hands of big Pharma (no wonder I just heard of this!) Anyway, I am going to post a link to her website, they are looking for tax deductible donations so they can fund the research themselves. I find this news heartening! I would do the trial in a hot minute myself but the idea that this could potentially cure cancer without surgery or heinous side effects makes me really happy for those that won’t have to experience the accepted harshness that can be conventional cancer treatment.
Well, we got through Thanksgiving, now we must make it through the rest of the holiday season! We can do this 😘
Until next time ❤️