Too Hot To Handle: The constipation diarrheas
Charles walked in on me as I was watching the latest season of "Too Hot To Handle" on Netflix, yet another terrible reality show I watch. This kind of thing is my go to when I am couched for one reason or another. After starting to have fevers this week I became the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka Tuesday night...Having an ostomy and diarrhea is both alarming and hilarious. I started having the cramps and weird belly noises along with the sweats and then the eruption began. I have had this happen only a couple times in the last few years and thankfully my bag didn't blow off of me like a broken water main but I had to be swift. My main bathroom is my massage room/wound care bathroom behind my house and I grabbed the key, locked the door and then got onto the toilet. The bag was full and bulging and when I took it off a steady stream of foul sludge poured out of me like one of those play dough machines from the eighties. This is when Charles decided he wanted to also come through the room to get to his gym but thankfully the door was locked. I texted him "having diarrhea" a text everyone longs to get. After that night I have had nothing but an angry turtle trying to break out of my butthole feeling since last night and it sucks.
I used to stand on my head to help constipation in the past but my core is not quite stable enough for that so I did a modified bridge with a yoga block for awhile. Right now I have a heat pack on my tummy and I intermittently rock my body...Also I have taken a couple doses of Miralax but that is slow.
It's a weird kind of panic that ensues when things that are supposed to come out of the body won't and the volume is even louder when the butt is on the front.
I have things to do and this is so annoying. It's also a little scary and feels like a little backslide but maybe I am just being dramatic.
Hopefully I will have relief soon and I can finish decorating my house for the holidays without feeling this incredible discomfort.
Until next time❤️