Jeez, you don't know how important your hemoglobin is until it is really low...I feel like the floor is lava and I only want to lay down on literally anything, even the lava. The smallest task is monumental as my heart wavers on the beat and my breathing is a bit harder. Even holding this IPad in order to one finger type is pushing it for me right now and I still need to clean the bathroom of our Airbnb. That being said I feel better in other ways and I am hopeful.
Yesterday I was at the hospital for my clinical trial for 11 hours, this was for regular tests and observation as well as an iron infusion and extra fluids. I struggled to stay awake for a lot of this and napping is not my normal inclination. A nurse who happens to share a first name with me woke me up for vitals by gently rubbing my back. We talked for a bit as I came to and she told me that people who participate in clinical trials are a special kind of hero. This was nice to hear but I asked her what other choice did I really have? "You think that because of the kind of person you are. Not everyone chooses this and you are helping so many others." At least there is that, I tell myself that no matter how this plays out, it will be worthwhile in some way...I am truly hoping for a win/win though.
*Side note: If you choose not to go into a clinical trial that is a choice you make for whatever reason you have and I respect it. Sometimes we don't have anything else to give, sometimes we just get tired and sometimes we are just done. Science will still plow ahead.
I still have to do my taxes 😬😳🙄
Until next time ❤️
It IS a win because we LEARN from every single person who steps into a trial, hoping for help for themselves but also willing to block cancer's way a little bit more for others in the future. Think of it as placing stones in a wall. You may well build enough wall to protect yourself. But whether you do or not, you have added stones to a wall that will one day be complete.
How did we get Keytruda? Gleevec? So many other drugs that were unheard of when you and I were kids, and that now save lives from cancers that were once thought to be unsurvivable? We got those drugs because people stepped forward, joined clinical trials, and…