I think this as I watch my aged old last pug (barely) standing, Cooper Duper. As a youth he was relentless when it came to fetch, there was never an off button but now he sleeps a lot, eats twice a day, paces like a furry, blind and hunched gargoyle when it’s close to dinner time (about 2 hours before 5pm is when he starts) after dinner he sleeps again and then I put him into the kitchen at his bedtime…I know, how does he do it? I often check to see if he is breathing, I am to Coop what Charles has been to me, the caregiver just trying to help but prepared to find a sweet and tired body devoid of life.
I was in the grocery store the other day and the checker commented on my full dog sleeve tattooed on my right arm. “I wanted to have them all put on me while they were alive so they could admire themselves.” I told her also that my dogs had helped me through my cancer so far, two gone now to seek their ultimate rests. The woman told me of a friends daughter who died of cancer and that this persons dog succumbed to the same cancer and died soon after “Her mom said the dog was being summoned to be with her daughter…Isn’t that sweet?” The checker asked me. I quickly said that animals are the canaries in our coal mines and often (in my opinion) absorb our pain and sickness in an effort to ease our burdens. The idea that someone would summon a creature from the beyond just doesn’t sit right with me, it’s really kind of douchey if you think about it. Of course I do tend to walk on the more pragmatic if a bit woo woo side of the street. I know the woman was well meaning and a bit trapped in the Hallmark movie idea of a girl longing so much for her dog that SHE INFECTS IT WITH PAINFUL TUMORS 😳 but I feel that movie would technically be in one of those straight to horror streaming craptastic catalogs that one could rent from Amazon Prime “I killed Mr. Furrito from the beyond and YOU‘RE Next!” or something along those lines.
I am still feeling decent if a little lower energy due to the cold I am getting over. I am so happy the sun is finally out! There are so many things I need and want to do but even though I seem completely better I am still not quite and that’s okay. I wasn’t expected to still be here by A LOT of people, most of whom were my doctors for sure but sometimes me…This is fresh territory and though I must test these new wings I need to wait for them to fully dry…Thankfully the sun is back so they just might one of these days🙂
Until next time ❤️